How to Speak American

And Crown Thy Good With Brotherhood From Sea to Shining Sea

The funny thing about that statement is how much the people of America do not actually follow it. You all know what I am talking about, the Coca-Cola Super Bowl Ad that has caused an uproar across the nation.

Because only in the United States would people be so ignorant and selfish to get angry over a commercial that expresses unity.

It doesn’t matter which language it was spoken in, we all knew what it meant. Coca-Cola wanted to express that there is diversity in America and that diversity should be embraced for all people to see.

Let’s take a look at the video here:

Oh my gosh are those people of different races speaking different languages? OH THE HORROR.
Bite Me.

I’m honestly surprised more people didn’t whine about the fact that the line “God Shed His Grace On Thee” was left in the song because that seems to be the standard for people these days. Anyway, the #speakamerican uproar does nothing but show the true ignorance of some of the people in our nation. For one, the Europeans stole this land from the Native Americans, so if you want to speak English, why don’t you ferry your ass back to England where it originated from? The only people who should have any right to complain about an official original language for this nation are the Native American people. The rest of the American people need to shut up because they are not descended from people who actually lived here. Two, did you, the educated people of this country also know that American isn’t actually a language? Are you smart enough to actually grasp that concept? That’s just as bad as saying people from Mexico speak Mexican instead of Spanish. And the whole immigration issue. How about all of you “home-grown” people who hate illegals realize that your ancestors were immigrants! I for one think the Native Americans should have been just as judgmental and rude as the people of the USA are today. Then they wouldn’t have been put on reservations and treated like a subhuman species! They NEEDED a better immigration policy and should have turned every one of those English away instead of trying to educate them and help them survive!

Let’s say we adopt English as our formal language. Which dialect of English do we pick?  Do we pick the mid-west? How about the New England, more specifically the Bostonian dialect of English….or better yet, let’s pick the New Orleans dialect of English and speak Cajun English?

Oh…….wait, even our English is multi-cultural? WHAT? NO WAY!

The differences in saying in my household alone are crazy because I was born in Pennsylvania and my fiance was born in North Carolina. The first time he told me to “cut the light” I looked at him in utter confusion. For those of you that don’t know, it’s common place in his hometown and below the Mason Dixon line to say that when they want to turn something off. Eventually, I got that he wanted me to do that, and turned off the light.

I imagine when the forefathers of the America as we know it, not the America that was stolen from the Natives, got together that they didn’t imagine the people of this nation would be so ignorant to the problems of the world and the people in their own country. I imagine they felt we would evolve and get along with one another independent of our differences.

If anything, this #speakamerican trend is doing nothing but spitting in their faces. Every single person that posted something condemning this commercial should be ashamed of themselves and their ignorance to the world around them. The world does NOT revolve around you. Use the brain in your head to realize there is more to life then the house and community you live in. Stop clinging to your gun because it won’t save you from yourself. Stop clinging to your Bible  and abusing it because you are NOT acting in the name of Jesus Christ AT ALL. Jesus healed the afflicted and helped people. He didn’t give a shit about what language someone spoke.

And while we are on the subject: If you believe in Jesus……..Jesus wasn’t white either. Just FYI. He was born in the Middle East….so he’s the stereotypical definition of Un-American to all of you that are assholes and say it is in his name.

One nation.
A nation divided.
Because people still after how many years of evolution aren’t smart enough to put their differences aside.

If you want to speak “American” it’s really simple: Be an entitled ass that does not care about anyone else. You will then be right on your way to speaking American.

Don’t Ever Take Dating Advice From Taylor Swift

If there is one person that I really think gives the worst dating advice, it is Taylor Swift. And she doesn’t even give it purposely.

She writes about it in her songs.

I cannot stand that. For one thing, it is extremely disrespectful for someone to view love as a money-making scheme. And that’s all she is proving by writing all of her hits about her ex-boyfriends. She may not think that is what she is doing, but it is. If she had any respect for the people she dated, she wouldn’t publicly bash them in her music while millions of listeners are so impressionable. It just shows young people everywhere that it’s okay to date someone and break up with them……

as long as you can write a song that people will eat up and listen to.

Now, I do not condone staying in a bad relationship by any means. In fact, if you are in a bad relationship, then get out. But, please spare us the bull and don’t write a song about it. I think it would be very interesting to see what all of her former lovers would have to say in a song about her. And I guarantee it would go along the lines of her being selfish. The first thing I notice about her is that she does not care about the other person. Let’s look back at when Harry whats-his-face won a music award and her response was “Are You Kidding Me?”

Harsh much?

I get it, she’s empowered.

But she isn’t really.

Almost three years ago I started writing blogs about females embracing their imperfections and flaws. And one of things I’ve noticed that has taken off with this subject is females not “settling” for less than they deserve. Now, I agree with this. But I also would like to point out to many females out there that men can do the same thing. Being empowered does not give you a license to be a bitch to everyone around you, or to parade around bashing men because it is the thing to do. Being empowered means that you have found an inner strength to yourself that would only be enhanced if a man walked into your life (or woman, whichever you prefer). The key here is to not become selfish along the way. Most relationships fail because of lack of communication. They also fail because the people in those relationships focus more on what they can take from the other person than what they can give.

This is why I say don’t ever take dating advice from Taylor Swift.

Because Taylor Swift never focuses on self-reflection, it’s always about what the other person did.

And that’s why her relationships failed and will continue to until she looks at what she can give to another person. And it may take the right person for her to do that. And she by no means has to be willing to give of herself at her age….she can wait. But deep down, when I see her.

I see someone that’s afraid.

You want dating advice. I’ll give you some dating advice from what I’ve learned with my fiance and what I learned watching my grandparents be together for my whole life. They were married almost 58 years before my grandpa passed away.

1) The relationship isn’t just about YOU. There are two people. There are two hearts beating. There are two sets of needs that need met. There are two sets of expectations there.
2) Don’t say, “I want you to do this.” Instead try, “What can we do make this better” or “Where can I work on making things better.” A little humility never hurts. I have news for you. I’m empowered. I’m stubborn. I’m a bad ass female…..and I can still be humble because I realize there is one another person that has the other half of my soul.
3) Learn what phrases to say to the other person. If you think the other person isn’t listening, change your approach. My fiance and I know which phrases get the other person to do what we want and which phrases will piss us off instantly. Communicate. It’s a constant learning process…but once again…this is where a little humility can come in to play. Also, if you don’t want to take their bullshit. Don’t. But address it in the correct way. Because they don’t have to put up with yours either.
4) Don’t think you can change them or their habits. This is simple. Don’t insult the other person by trying to drastically change who they are as a person. I mean, do you want to stop being that badass female? No. You don’t. So don’t expect the other person to drastically change to make you happy. It’s wrong. Either love them at the core of who they are or move on and save yourself a lot of stupid heartache.
5) Don’t talk all the time. Listen too.  The person you’re with will tell you what is wrong and what they want….you just have to listen to them. I don’t mean hear them….I mean listen.
6) Stop thinking you’re always right. I still struggle with this. But, I’m learning and he is very patient with me. Almost three years and diamond ring patient.
7) Focus on what you Give. Give to the other person. Constantly. Compromise. I love compromising. It is literally the best of both worlds. And occasionally something I didn’t want to do ends up being something I liked anyway. Don’t take from the other person and don’t let yourself be taken advantage of. But, give.
8) Real love isn’t a fairy tale. Just get over it. It’s not. There’s no white horse. There’s no castle. Just. NO. Move on from the childish version of love to the more awesome version I saw in my grandparent’s marriage. You want a sweet love story? Watch UP! Seriously, the first eight minutes of that movie was the best love story I’ve ever seen filmed. Oh, and date the beast, not the prince. People always call me and mine the Beauty and the Beast. I like it that way. People with layers are more interesting than the people without them.

Above all. Realize that anything in life worth having is something you have to fight for and work for. It’s not going to be easy. Learn to embrace your own beauty and imperfections first…..

Then, embrace someone else’s.

And Taylor, don’t be afraid to fall in love. It’s the most interesting adventure you could ever go on.

Adventure is out there.
Jump Feet First.